GayMatter - Thoughts on the same-sex issue

Going to the heart of the matter:

Reasons we support same-sex marriage — or not
From 20-plus years of intense listening and writing

An unexpected pattern brings clarity
Indepth look at the basis — and implications — of a stat often mentioned on this site

What about divorce?
Does the church have a double-standard, treating divorce differently than homosexuality?

Bible studies

1 Corinthians 6:9-11 - A strong understanding

(Prepared for a series of conversations by eight pastors who met to discuss Bible texts bearing on same-sex partnerships. A great group: covering the spectrum on the issue; good-hearted persons, each with an inner peace making it as easy to be silent as to speak.)

Romans 1:18-32 - Interpretations I have met

(Prepared for the same series of conversations.)

Other writing which impacted me

A possible celibacy – Excerpt from Wesley Hill, Washed and Waiting.
A robust and vital faith in the Christian story can help us picture celibacy as attainable.

Is the Traditional View of Marriage Harmful to LGBTQ People?
Summary excerpts from an article by Preston Sprinkle. Also a listing of the 21 conversations in Sprinkle's book (Aug 2023): Does the Bible Support Same-Sex Marriage?: 21 Conversations from a Historically Christian View

Consistent Sexual Sacrifice
Everyone — straight and gay — must be invited to walk a countercultural way, the way of Jesus. Article by Kevin A. Miller.

Summary of Holben's "Six Representative Viewpoints"
Holben gives us a common vocabulary or shorthand as we describe our stance on this issue

Richard B. Hays' story of Gary
This friendship shaped Hays' stance on homosexuality

Summary of What Is Marriage? by Sherif Girgis, Ryan T. Anderson and Robert P. George
This 2013 Supreme Court Amici Curiae Brief gives reasons from social science and public interest for recognizing marriage as a conjugal relationship (which only a man and woman can form) rather than a mere emotional union that any two (or more) adults can form.

Sermon - preached June 3, 2012 at Trissels Mennonite Church, Broadway VA
PDF - "Hear the Spirit on same-sex unions"

Articles/blogs/statements written for my church

In recent years my denomination (Mennonite Church USA) tried to stay together by affirming two resolutions in tension with each other: the Membership Guidelines (which uphold the traditional understanding of marriage) and the Forbearance resolution (which makes space for variance with the Guidelines). We affirmed them both at our Assembly in 2015, publicly acknowledging how divided we are. But in May 2022 we voted to “retire” the Guidelines since LGBTQ members report that it has “caused them harm.” We also voted to “repent” of the “violence” of the Guidelines — though if the traditional biblical consensus happens to be right, the Guidelines’ policies have been nudging LGBTQIA persons toward God’s good design, rather than doing “violence” to them. Our denomination is formed of conferences, and the conference to which my congregation belongs (Virginia Mennonite Conference) has to decide how to respond to the 2022 resolutions.

We Will Live in Grace and Truth
Statement by church leaders identifying themselves as ones committed 1) to relate in grace to same-sex couples and 2) to act on the truth that marriage is between one man and one woman.

2023 documents for Virginia Mennonite Conference

Agree-to-disagree on sexuality is not good

Many want us to embrace theological diversity rather than take a clear stance on same-sex. But dangers come with that.

My summary of the Bible on same-sex relations

Oct 16 - Why many of us are pursuing realignment

A presentation to the leadership teams of many congregations that are taking steps to leave VMC and MC USA.

July 24 - What happened at assembly? What does it mean for us?

Simple description of the three assembly resolutions. And implications of the one not affirmed.

July 16 - Personal reflections on our assembly and the Faith and Praxis Resolution

Intensely personal account of the assembly; long note on my efforts to understand the 75% threshold.

July 7 - The F&P resolution is good!

Listening and responding to many misinterpretations of the Faith and Praxis Resolution.

Video: Same-sex marriage—is there harm in the historic Christian stance?
Presentation I gave to a sister congregation giving a window into how a compassionate follower-of-Jesus can hold the traditional (biblical!) view even in the face of persistent reports of harm it causes LGBTQ folks.

jump to section on 1Cor 6 and Rom 1
jump to section on harm to LGBTQ persons from Scripture's stance

My blogs from an extensive conversation on this matter
A group of eight Mennonite pastors in the Harrisonburg VA area met from April to November 2016 for a series of conversations on the Bible and same-sex intimacy.

A reason for full inclusion—or not
Is the argument from experience able to bear the weight placed on it? (Mar 27, 2017 MWR; and Mar 2017 The Mennonite)

Formed by culture?
What moves us toward same-sex marriage — the Spirit and Word, or society? (Feb 2, 2015 MWR)

Two calls to heed
Both ends of the spectrum need to face something difficult. (June 23, 2014 TMail article)

A right that is wrong
As acceptance of gay partnerships grows, the church holds a different standard. (June 24, 2013 MWR - a l-o-n-g comment stream!) entire article

Membership guidelines allow conversation
We as a denomination need to talk. And the term "teaching position" is a valuable tool as we do so. (Feb 2013, The Mennonite)

Hope for unity on the "h-issue"
Four things I have learned during our denominational struggle (devotional given to their Executive Board in 2005).

Listening and responding to voices of inclusion
Simple observations on arguments for same-sex partnerships and on the witness of Scripture. (Article in MC USA's "Biblical and theological resources on sexual and gender identity")
On arguments for full inclusion of those in same-sex partnerships
On the biblical witness concerning same-sex sex
On attempts to deflect the Biblical witness

« Interacting with Jesus «

Though we are tired (I am!), attention must be given to same-sex marriage, the issue that divides our church.

Imagine a person saying to their doctor: "Yes, I know there is something in my body that might threaten my future health; but I'm not going to take time away from my life work to look at it."

Some hope that we as a church can stay together as long as we celebrate our many values and dreams in common. That is not enough. Not while our differences over same-sex marriage are a matter of conscience. Consider:
• Some of us see opposing same-sex marriage as "obedience to a loving God who undoubtedly knows best when he lays down rules for human conduct" while others in our church see such opposition as "intolerance, bigotry, and hate."
• This marriage that is seen by one segment of us as "among the highest virtues," as "loving commitments of mutual care and support," is seen by another segment as "disordered conduct that violates natural law and scriptural command."
Making it exponentially worse, this one issue is a proxy issue for two distinct and opposing cultural and theological streams.

Is there any hope?

Whatever we do must involve biblical/communal discernment. Do the biblical writers view all forms of same-sex sex as against our Creator's design? Or do the Spirit and the Word call the church to fully include those in same-sex marriages, blessing their covenants and ordaining those with pastoral gifts?

Few persons will change their stance on same-sex marriage as a result of such "discernment." But it is possible that persons with differing stances would begin to empathize with each other. For instance, those holding to the church's historic stance might begin to see how persons — compelled by careful study of Scripture — have come to a different conclusion about same-sex marriage. This would free their conscience to allow for variance of practice. And we could continue as a divided, but still united, church.

This "discernment" might also result in progressives realizing the strength of the historic stance — that the conservative conscience will probably not go away. This has grown more and more likely in my mind, as these pages show. If you believe I'm wrong, please help me see what you see!

Harold N Miller
Broadway VA (formerly Corning NY)

« Interacting with Jesus «